


occam's razor

by celegant



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Canon Compliant, M/M, POV Outsider, Secret Relationship, one-sided pining on sungchan's part, written for markhyuck week day 2: secrets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:48:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28361175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/celegant/pseuds/celegant
Summary: It started to become common knowledge among them—spend enough time around Lee Donghyuck and one way or another, come hell or high water, you walk away with a piece of your heart invariably missing.He thinks back to then, and regrets not taking the others’ warnings seriously enough.Because if there’s one thing any SM trainee knows, it’s that Lee Donghyuck has never given anybody a second glance, always armed ready with an apologetic grin and an empathetic, ‘I’m sorry, but I’m interested in someone else.’(Or: Sungchan walks out of his first official practice with flushed cheeks, the soft echo of melodic laughter ringing in his ears, and the beginnings of what he knows is going to be a heartbreaking crush on NCT’s resident troublemaker.)
Relationships: Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee
Comments: 201
Kudos: 1503
Collections: Favorites, Markhyuck Week 2021





	occam's razor

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Tiếng Việt available: [occam's razor](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29035368) by [Nuny](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nuny/pseuds/Nuny)



> a HUGE thank you to every single person that's helped me work through this fic ;;; julia, sina, and lu especially, this would Literally not exist without you guys talking me through it klsdsk

There are a lot of things that SM trains you for prior to debut.

Sungchan’s been training for this for literal _years_ after all, with countless hours poured into learning how to sing and rap, how to dance, how to _stand—_ both hands clasped tightly in front and back ramrod straight as he learned to smile for the camera.

He thought he knew exactly what he signed up for when they said he was joining NCT for their 2020 lineup, fine print and all.

So, he was ready. As ready as he could be, anyway—for catching up to a group already four years into debut, for all of the mixed reactions that was sure to come with the announcement. He was ready for the inevitable blood, sweat, and tears. All of it, just for a chance to prove that he _at least_ deserved to be here.

What he _wasn’t_ ready for, though, was having to come face to face with the catastrophic hurricane that was Lee Haechan.

He’s heard a lot about all the members of NCT, don’t get him wrong. The SM rookies’ rumor mill was probably one of the most active ones in the industry, and there isn’t an idol under their company that hasn’t been burned at least once.

He knows better than to listen to them though—he knows it’s rubbish most of the time. An exaggerated encounter here, a hyperbolic tale there, mostly from people who don’t understand industry decorum. The older rookies know not to give these kinds of things a lot of credence, especially regarding the ones about any of the NCT members, given that there’s always the chance that they’d end up working with them one day.

So, when a couple of executives had pulled him aside one day to tell him that he’s debuting in NCT with the Resonance album, he hadn’t even batted an eyelash.

There were some familiar faces, of course. He’d been in the system for long enough that he’s trained with many of NCT’s existing members. Mostly with those who were added into the group later—like Jungwoo and some of the younger members from WayV—but he’s participated in a workshop or two with some of the others from 127 and Dream too, so it wasn’t like he was going in completely blind.

He knew it’d be a little weird coming into a group with already established dynamics, with friendships and bonds between certain members that were obvious even to those on the outside. But it was fine, he told himself. He got along well enough with most of them, and he knows it’ll just take some time for everyone to get used to things.

The morning before his first official practice with the whole group, and he was ready to charm the _pants_ out of everyone in that room.

He wasn’t prepared to walk out of there with flushed cheeks, the soft echo of melodic laughter ringing in his ears, and the beginnings of what he knows is going to be a heartbreaking crush on NCT’s resident troublemaker.

* * *

He keeps it to himself, at first—hoping it’d fade with time, attributing the fluttering in his stomach to the novelty of being around someone so bright.

But weeks pass, and the nervous jitters whenever Donghyuck gets too close doesn’t go away. He knows the other boy’s just being friendly. He can see the way Donghyuck treats everyone in that practice room, and he knows he’s just another one of Donghyuck’s unfortunate casualties.

He remembers the rumors. And well, they weren’t even really _rumors_ , so much as they were just gossip between all of the rookies, talking about whichever one of them had been stupid enough to cross paths with Lee Donghyuck and thought they could come out unscathed.

He remembers listening to some of his fellow trainees gush over the sun-kissed boy, endless praises falling from their lips that he all but brushed away without a second thought. He remembers every poor sap with a crush, coming back from a failed confession with their head hung low, and shoulders hunched in apparent rejection.

It started to become common knowledge among them—spend enough time around Lee Donghyuck and one way or another, come hell or high water, you walk away with a piece of your heart invariably missing.

He thinks back to then, and regrets not taking the others’ warnings seriously enough.

Because if there’s one thing any SM trainee knows, it’s that Lee Donghyuck has never given anybody a second glance, always armed ready with an apologetic grin and an empathetic, ‘ _I’m sorry, but I’m interested in someone else._ ’

Weeks pass, and then another month, and when Donghyuck passes by him to innocently ruffle his hair after a particularly rough run of their choreography, he knows this little problem is here to stay.

So naturally, he goes to Jungwoo first.

“You poor thing,” is the first thing that comes out of Jungwoo’s mouth. “I’m so sorry, kid. That’s gotta suck.”

Sungchan bites back another defeated sigh, slumping back against the couch in the corner of the practice room. Jungwoo pats his back consolingly, but he can tell that Jungwoo’s trying to bite back a laugh.

“I feel like I already know what the answer is gonna be,” he says, looking up at Jungwoo with a small pout. “But humor me, hyung. Do I even stand a chance?”

Jungwoo only snorts, shaking his head with pitying eyes. “Not in this lifetime, I’m afraid.”

He can only nod wordlessly in response, having long since accepted the fact. He looks up then, eyes scanning across the practice room, and despite the fact that he knows he shouldn’t be so obvious, his gaze naturally gravitates over to Donghyuck by the other end of the room.

Donghyuck’s huddled in the corner, back against the mirrors as he talks to the rest of the Dreamies. He’s seated himself in between Mark and Renjun, laughter ringing clear across the room at something that Mark had apparently said.

“Is he dating anyone?”

“You know I can’t answer that,” Jungwoo says, but not unkindly. “It isn’t my place to say, whether he is or he isn’t.”

Sungchan hums in consideration. He knew it was futile to ask, but figured it was worth a try.

He watches as Donghyuck hooks his arms around Renjun’s own, leaning heavily into his side in a display of playful affection. Renjun doesn’t even spare him a glance before pushing him away with a small quirk of the lips, the force of it enough to push him into Mark’s space instead.

“The rookies know all about it, you know,” Sungchan starts, voice low, almost a whisper. “He used to reject everyone with the same excuse. I wonder if he still feels the same.” His eyes flit over to Jungwoo’s curious expression. “If he ever moved on to somebody else.”

Jungwoo sits back, shoulder knocking against his as he turns his attention to Donghyuck as well.

“Well,” he says. “Now you know what he’s like. What do _you_ think?”

On the other side of the room, Donghyuck lets out a whine at Renjun’s rejection. He doubles down and tries to cling harder, earning him another shove for his efforts, but Mark’s quick to catch him before he topples over in his seat, hands braced against Donghyuck’s shoulders as his own start to shake with mirth at the younger boys’ antics. Donghyuck relaxes back against Mark’s chest, tongue sticking out childishly in Renjun’s direction when Renjun sends him an amused smirk, perfectly paired with a teasingly arched brow.

“I think,” Sungchan murmurs, before closing his eyes. He takes a second to re-adjust his hat, bringing the brim of it down lower to cast a shadow over his face. “I think that he isn’t the type to give up until he gets what he wants.”

The response startles a soft laugh out of Jungwoo, who brings an arm around his shoulder to strong-arm him into a hug, Jungwoo’s other arm coming around to rub at his shoulder in what is supposed to be a comforting gesture. Any other day, he’d probably try to get out of it, but he leans into it, just this once.

“You’re right about one thing at least,” Jungwoo says. “But don’t feel too bad. It happens to the best of us.” He snorts then, as if remembering a particularly funny memory. “And if it’s any consolation, you’re not alone in NCT either. Hyuck’s taken down a couple others, just like you. Kid’s a natural heartbreaker, unfortunately.”

“Really?” he croaks out, voice more miserable than he should probably let be, but he can’t help it.

“Yeah, but it all worked out fine in the end,” Jungwoo reassures. “You’re a smart kid, Channie, so you’ll be alright. You just have to give it some time.”

* * *

It turns out he isn’t as subtle as he thinks he is, when it comes to hopelessly pining over Donghyuck from a distance.

A few of the members seemed to have caught on—other than Jungwoo, there had been the Jaemin Incident (“I thought I taught you better than this.” Jaemin had sighed then, a sad pat on Sungchan’s shoulder as he turned back to the rest of their little after-practice crew. “Hyuck got another one!”), followed shortly by Doyoung and Taeyong’s endlessly pitying looks.

Even Mark had given him an odd look or two, though he’d never really said anything about it.

It’s Jeno that ends up slipping up, in the end. He’d wondered at the time, whether it was because he was Donghyuck’s friend. Or maybe it was because he knew more about Donghyuck’s mystery person than the others did.

Nevertheless, it’s Jeno that sits him down one day, dragging him out to the corner store in the wee hours of the morning, citing insomnia and a need for a 3 AM snack. They find a spot out by the front of the store, plastic furniture rickety as they dump their stuff all over the table, and the cold chill in the air makes him shiver in his seat.

It’s also Jeno that breaks the awkward silence that settles between them, whispered words more of a statement than a question.

“You like him,” Jeno says simply, leaving no room for argument.

He hesitates for a second, before ducking his head down in a curt nod, stomach turning at the blunt declaration. “Yeah.”

Jeno doesn’t say anything for a while, gaze fixated on the table in front of him where their cups of instant ramyun sit steaming, waiting for the noodles to finish cooking. Then, he sighs, a breathless little laugh leaving him as he runs a tired hand over his face.

“I did too, once,” Jeno confesses, voice quiet. “So I get it.” He pauses for a beat, before looking up, inexplicably sad eyes meeting his own. “I’m sorry, man.”

That’s all everyone seems to be able to say these days. Their knee-jerk reaction to hearing about Donghyuck and any wayward _feelings_ that may be involved.

“Did you…” Sungchan licks his lips in apprehension. “Did you ever do anything about it?”

He watches as Jeno reaches for his little bowl of ramyun, peeling the cover back and humming noncommittally as he mixes its contents.

“I did,” Jeno eventually says. “I confessed to him sometime last year, actually.”

Sungchan’s eyes widen at the revelation, head snapping up to look at Jeno in slight disbelief. Last year wasn’t even that long ago. Not at all.

It sounds like a pretty fresh wound, and he can’t help the small wince that forms on his face in sympathy.

“Can I ask what happened?” he asks hesitantly. He blinks a couple times, before quickly backtracking. “You don’t have to, of course. I wouldn’t want to overstep, hyung—”

Jeno lets out a small chuckle then, a friendly eye-smile coming out in full force at how flustered he was getting.

“It’s fine, really,” Jeno says. “I’ve gotten over it for the most part, and I knew it was for the best.” He takes his time then, taking a bite of his food before leaning back in his seat. He tilts his head back, gaze turned up towards the night sky as he starts talking. “Long story short is that I confessed and he rejected me, but we’ve been friends for too long to let that ruin us, so we tried our best to make sure things didn’t get weird.”

Sungchan listens intently, food remaining mostly untouched. His fingers fiddle around the bottle cap of his drink instead, just something to do to keep his hands busy.

Jeno stretches his back, arms reaching up before he relaxes and looks back down, a wry smile on his face as he continues, “I went into that confession knowing I was going to be rejected though, so I wasn’t surprised.” Then, he shrugs. “But I knew I had to get it off my chest, or else I wouldn’t have been able to move on.”

Sungchan brows furrow in response. “What do you mean you knew?”

“Exactly that,” Jeno unhelpfully replies. “I knew what Hyuck was going to say, after all. I’ve been friends with him since we were trainees.” He cocks his head to the side playfully, a small, rueful smile playing on the corners of his lips as he regards Sungchan in front of him. “And I’m sure you know what that means.”

The ‘ _I’m sure you know_ exactly _what his reply was_ ’ goes unsaid.

He lets out a sigh, leaning forwards until his forehead meets the table with a dull _thump_. “Even you, huh?”

That earns him a laugh from Jeno, and an affectionate pat on the head. “Yep,” he chirps. “Though, if you knew who the competition was, you wouldn’t be surprised either.”

“And I’m guessing you can’t tell me who it is?”

“My lips are sealed, unfortunately.” Jeno mimes zipping his lips and throwing away the key. “Bro code, and all that.”

“Jungwoo hyung said something similar,” he sighs. His voice lowers, almost meek as he asks, “Are they really that great though? For Donghyuck hyung to still be so hung up on them, even after all this time?”

Jeno hums in consideration, and a few moments pass as he thinks of what to say.

“Let me put it this way,” Jeno starts. “If the idea of soulmates actually existed, then that means Hyuck had already found his a long, long time ago.”

Jeno shakes his head fondly, and somehow, he just _knows_ that Jeno means it when he says he’s over Donghyuck. Can hear the sincerity in his voice as he wishes him nothing but the best.

He wonders then, if he’ll ever be able to get to that point himself.

“There are some things in life that just _are_ , y’know? Some things that are immutable. Inevitable in a way that you know is just a matter of time,” Jeno continues. When he smiles, it’s a touch sad—a little wistful but gentle nonetheless. “And honestly? I genuinely can’t think of anyone who could be more perfect for him.”

“Well, when you put it that way,” Sungchan trails off, gaze fixating down on the twisted bottle cap in his hands. “I just hope they know what they’re doing. It sounds like hyung’s waited for long enough.”

“You don’t have to worry. They’re both stubborn idiots sometimes,” Jeno snorts, before his smile grows into a proper grin. “But they deserve each other, really.”

* * *

He starts picking up on a couple of clues here and there, once he knows what to look for. He isn’t blind, after all, and Donghyuck isn’t a particularly subtle person.

It’s all in the little things, he realizes. Even if Jeno hadn’t inadvertently confirmed it, all of the signs point to Donghyuck obviously having _someone_ , but he just can’t put his finger on _who_.

It starts when he notices that Donghyuck slips out of the practice room sometimes, phone in hand as he excuses himself to take a call. He’s even walked in on him on the phone once—albeit unintentionally, on his way back from the bathrooms—back braced against the wall to stay hidden as Donghyuck’s soft voice reaches his ears.

“ _I miss you, too_.”

He’s never heard Donghyuck’s voice like this before—words relayed in a way that was inexplicably fond, almost tender. He tries to imagine the expression on Donghyuck’s face as he speaks, and finds himself wondering if it’s an expression he’s ever actually _seen_ or if it was something only reserved for whoever was on the other side of the line.

“ _Yeah—mm, I’ll see you soon. Text me when you get back, okay?_ ” A pause, then a quiet, twinkling laugh. “ _Shut up. I’m hanging up now, asshole._ ” Another pause, and Donghyuck’s voice grows quieter, almost whisper-soft. “ _Bye, baby._ ”

He holds his breath when Donghyuck seemingly ends the call, the hand gripping his phone falling down limply by his side with a small, melancholic sigh. He sneaks further back into the empty corridor when he sees Donghyuck start to make his way back into the practice room.

When he eventually makes his way back as well, he’s greeted to the sight of Donghyuck grinning as he always does, boisterous as ever as he tries to liven up their exhausted little crew. He flutters around everyone, energy seemingly endless as he coaxes laugh after laugh despite probably being tired himself.

The sudden contrast from what he’d just witnessed in the halls is so jarring, that he briefly wonders whether the Donghyuck he heard on the phone was just a figment of his imagination—so different compared to the Donghyuck he sees in front of them now.

There’s a whole other side to Donghyuck that no one knows about, he realizes. One that only a select few are probably privy to, and he briefly wonders if whoever was on the other end of that call knows just how lucky they really are.

* * *

And then, there are the times when Donghyuck thinks no one’s looking.

He catches the way Donghyuck’s eyes tend to dart around, counting heads and looking back behind him. Always searching, he realizes. For who, he’s not really sure, but he doesn’t miss the way Donghyuck’s smile falls just ever so slightly when he can’t find who he’s looking for.

It’s curious, and it makes him wonder how long Donghyuck’s been doing this for that no one else seems to give it a second thought.

* * *

It was obviously someone in NCT, that much was clear. And someone that Donghyuck isn’t always with, if the frequent phone calls were any indication.

He’d tried to do some of his own sleuthing, tried to see if he could narrow down the list of potential suspects just by watching the way Donghyuck acted around the rest of their group.

But still, figuring it out was easier said than done.

Donghyuck is careful, for the most part, and even the other members that seemed to be in the know keep their lips tightly sealed. There were the occasional teasing looks thrown in Donghyuck’s direction here and there, raised eyebrows and amused quirks of the lips at something he’s not _seeing_ —but never anything that clued him into who the other guilty party actually was.

Plus, it didn’t really help that he was still in the process of getting to know everyone either. It was hard enough to find time to catch up with the members in his own unit, let alone an entire group of 22 other men.

A couple more weeks pass in what feels like a blink of the eye, the comeback prep keeping him busier than he ever thought he could be, and the mystery of Donghyuck’s secret boyfriend continues to remain unanswered. It’s a little frustrating, he has to admit, because it feels like the answer is staring at him right in the face—tauntingly, like a name on the tip of his tongue that eludes him in the last second.

He doesn’t have the time to think about it though.

It’s his first time in the studio, nerves manifesting itself in a bouncing leg as he waits for his turn in the booth. The rest of NCT are scattered about in between the multiple recording rooms, with this one occupied by the unit recording for _Misfit_.

It’s a bit of an odd collection of people, he’s come to realize, all of NCT’s rappers in one place. A bit of an eclectic group. The only ones missing from their little party were Mark and Taeyong, who were apparently running a little late because of a scheduling conflict with SuperM.

He quietly clears his throat for what feels like the nth time in the last ten minutes, his grip on the empty paper cup of water tight enough to crumple it around the rim.

“Unclench, kid,” Johnny quips from where he’s standing by the center console. Johnny laughs a little under his breath as he takes in Sungchan’s stiff form on the couch, back ram-rod straight as he sits against the leather cushions. “You have nothing to be nervous about.”

“I can’t help it,” he says weakly, voice cracking a little near the end. He clears his throat one more time for good measure, before looking up to meet Johnny’s eyes, his own expression a little sheepish, grin more than a little helpless. “I’ve never recorded anything for _real_ real before.”

"Yeah, no, I get it. We've all been there," Johnny chuckles. "But you'll do just fine, I'm sure of it. And trust me, you'll feel a lot better about it once you actually get in there yourself." He turns his attention back to Jeno in the booth, keeping a watchful eye on everyone's progress in Taeyong's absence. "Just follow these guys' instructions and you'll be out of there in no time."

He can only nod wordlessly in response, slumping back against the back of the couch as he tries to make himself relax. He watches as Jeno goes through the last of his recordings, tuned in to the way that the producers make him go over a few different versions of the chorus until they get it just right.

Eventually, it's Johnny's turn in the booth, and he throws Johnny a quick thumbs up for good luck as Jeno comes back out into the main room and makes his way over to join him on the couch.

There's a knock on the door then, Donghyuck's head peeking through to scan around the room.

"Mind if I camp out here for a bit?" Donghyuck says quietly, voice almost a whisper and mischief playing on the slight curl to his lips. "Need to hide from Doyoung hyung for a while."

Jeno nods, gesturing for him to come further inside and scooting over to the side to make room for him on the couch between them. He's quickly come to learn that it's usually best not to question why Donghyuck does any of the things he does, and Donghyuck shoots Jeno a grateful look before making a beeline towards them, flopping down gracelessly into the cushions with a tired sigh.

Donghyuck looks exhausted, he notes with a slight frown—eye bags dark, obvious even through the multiple layers of makeup. Donghyuck's eyes start to flutter shut as he tips his head back against the couch, eyelashes fanning prettily against his cheeks for a few moments before he opens his eyes once more, blinking blearily as he hides a small yawn behind a curled fist.

"Where's everyone else?" Donghyuck asks, voice a little rough, scratchy from the hours spent in his own booth.

"Hendery hyung and Yangyang are next door with the rest of WayV, I think," Jeno answers. "They finished recording for us a while ago." Then, he nods over to the booth, where Johnny's jotting some notes down onto the sheet in front of him. "And Johnny hyung just went inside."

Donghyuck hums. "And Mark and Taeyong hyung?"

"On their way," Jeno says. "Should be here soon, actually. There's only them and Sungchan left for our song."

Donghyuck turns his head over towards him, teasing smile already in place as he says, "Oh? You haven't gone yet?"

He shakes his head in response, hating the fact that he can feel his cheeks start to heat up at the sudden attention. "Not yet."

Donghyuck nudges his shoulder against his own. "You'll do great," he says, an echo of Johnny's earlier words. "Just don't do anything Jeno and the hyungs _would_ do, and you'll be golden."

He hears Jeno snort from his side on the couch, but he doesn't bother dignifying Donghyuck's jabs with a proper response.

Donghyuck yawns one more time, and this time, he can't help the concerned look he throws in Donghyuck's direction.

"Are you okay, hyung?"

The sudden question seems to take Donghyuck by surprise, but he nods his head with a wry smile, waving Sungchan's worries away with a dismissive shrug. "Just tired, is all. Didn't really get that much sleep last night."

Jeno raises a judging eyebrow at the vague answer. "Were you up all night again?"

"Guilty as charged," Donghyuck grins, a little shameless. "And before you ask, no, I wasn't up playing games. Not this time, at least. Taeyong hyung was too busy to play with me."

"Wasn't going to say anything," Jeno retorts. "What were you doing then?"

"Mm," Donghyuck hums once more, grin softening to a small, secretive smile. "Nothing too special. Just the usual."

A typical non-answer, he realizes. And he knows he's definitely missing something because Jeno says nothing for a beat, before shaking his head with a soft laugh under his breath.

"I see," Jeno says, reaching up to playfully poke at Donghyuck's cheek. "Smartass."

Donghyuck just laughs and shoves him away in retaliation.

"I'm glad though," Jeno continues. "It's been a while, hasn't it?"

"Yeah," Donghyuck trails off, the tips of his ears starting to turn pink. He offers no further explanation before relaxing fully against the couch.

Sungchan shoots Jeno a questioning look over Donghyuck’s shoulder, only to get a smile and a minute shake of the head in return.

"Well, I'm gonna take a nap," Donghyuck suddenly declares, wiggling a bit in his seat to make himself more comfortable. He crosses his arms in front of him, tipping his head back once more as he closes his eyes. "Wake me up when everyone's done, 'mkay? And if Doyoung hyung calls, tell him I'm not in here."

“Got it, boss,” Jeno jokes.

Donghyuck grins, eyes still closed, but says nothing more. He’s out like a light in a matter of minutes, head lolling slightly to the side as his breathing evens out. The image of a sleeping Donghyuck is adorable, he has to admit, but it’s also a testament to how tired he really was that he’d fallen asleep so quickly.

“Is he… always like this?” he asks quietly.

Johnny’s voice plays overhead as he continues to record, but Donghyuck doesn’t rouse at all, sleep undisturbed despite the constantly changing sounds.

“Yeah,” Jeno sighs. “He’s always kind of known how to fall asleep anywhere and anytime. It comes with the territory, I think, what with him working in two units and all.” Jeno shrugs then. “Him and Mark hyung have always been the worst ones when it came to sleep. You just kind of get used to it.”

He frowns down at Donghyuck’s still figure, a mixture of pity and admiration settling heavily in his chest at the thought. There’s a myriad of questions he wants to ask, but he gets cut short when Johnny finally steps back out of the booth, the nerves from earlier returning twofold when Johnny beckons him over for his turn.

The next half hour passes by in a blur as he gets thrown headfirst into the recording process. Johnny was right in that it wasn’t as bad as he thought it was going to be—the producers patient enough with him that there weren’t any real hiccups—but still. He knows it could’ve been better.

When he steps back out into the control room, the first thing he notices is that Donghyuck is still fast asleep, with both Jeno and Johnny nowhere to be found. The second thing he notices right away is that instead of leaning against the back of the couch like he’d seen him earlier, Donghyuck was now leaning against _Mark_ , head cushioned against Mark’s shoulder as Mark talks to Taeyong in hushed whispers.

He stops short, taking in the way Mark was carding his fingers through Donghyuck’s hair distractedly, almost as if he weren’t even conscious of it.

Taeyong’s the first one to notice him come out of the booth, head perking up with a proud little smile. “Hey,” he calls out. “Great job, kiddo.”

Mark smiles up at him and nods wordlessly in agreement, careful not to jostle Donghyuck against him.

“Johnny told us how nervous you were,” Taeyong continues. “But you killed it in there.”

He can feel himself flush a little at the praise, ducking his head as he murmurs a quick _thank you_ to them both. The adrenaline high from his earlier nerves finally starts to recede, and he flops down onto one of the empty office chairs as the rest of the tension bleeds out from him in waves.

“Jeno and Johnny went out for lunch downstairs,” Taeyong explains. “You’re free to go join them, if you wanted to? Mark and I still have a little while to go and we don’t want to make you wait.”

He shakes his head. He wasn’t about to pass up an opportunity to watch two of SM’s best at work.

“No, it’s fine, hyung,” he says. “I kind of wanted to watch? If that’s okay with you two?”

Taeyong nods, his smile kind. “Of course,” he says. Taeyong turns his attention to Mark then, brows furrowing slightly as he takes in the time. “But actually, Mark, do you mind going first? I wanted to check in with the other rooms before we leave today—”

“Sure, hyung,” Mark cuts him off with a knowing grin. “As long as you make sure Doyoung hyung isn’t out for blood by the time we get home.”

Taeyong snorts, lips twitching in an attempt to stave off a smile. “I think I can manage at least that. Thanks, Mark.” He moves to get up and leave the room, stopping short of the door to turn back and say, “Tell Donghyuck he owes you one when he wakes up.”

Mark snorts. “I’ll add it to his tab.”

Taeyong leaves, and he watches as Mark shifts slowly, carefully moving the sleeping Donghyuck to lean back against the couch as he gets up for his turn to record. Mark’s fingers brush away the stray strands of hair that’s fallen into Donghyuck’s eyes, before turning and shooting him a sheepish, apologetic look.

“Uh, sorry,” Mark says, gesturing vaguely in Donghyuck’s direction, “but do you mind...?”

Sungchan blinks, a prolonged beat passing as he figures out what Mark’s asking for.

“Oh.” He gets up to take Mark’s place on the couch next to Donghyuck, making sure the other boy doesn’t topple over in his sleep. “Yeah, I got him, hyung. Don’t worry.”

Mark grins, and he feels the wheels start to turn in the back of his head. “Thanks, man.”

His eyes trail after Mark as he takes a second to greet the producers before hurrying over into the booth.

“Okay, Mark,” one of the producers says, leaning forward to speak into the intercom. “Whenever you’re ready.”

Mark shoots them a small grin as he nods, re-adjusting his headset before giving the producers a quick thumbs up.

The first notes of _Misfit_ filter in through the speakers overhead, and Mark’s voice cuts clearly through the room with the beginning of the song. He watches with wide eyes, almost entranced, as Mark goes through his first few lines in a near-perfect take, the producers taking a second to commend Mark for a job well done as they move on to the next verse.

“Holy shit,” he breathes, the next words tumbling out of him almost unconsciously—a quiet admission, whispered mostly to himself. He thinks he may have held his breath throughout the entirety of Mark’s second verse. “Mark hyung’s incredible.”

“He really is, isn’t he?”

He’s snapped out of his awestruck reverie at the sound of Donghyuck’s sleep-rough voice beside him, flushing a little in embarrassment at being caught gawking. He starts to turn with a sheepish grin, already nodding in agreement before he freezes, any further praise for Mark getting caught in his throat at the sight of Donghyuck’s expression.

Cheeks tinted with a pretty pink, Donghyuck continues to stare ahead, sleepy gaze transfixed on Mark’s figure through the glass window as he continues to record. There’s a small smile playing on his lips, one that’s a little shy, maybe even a little starstruck himself—so unlike any expression he’s ever seen on Donghyuck’s face before.

The music stops playing and Mark finally looks up, gaze flitting briefly around the room before landing on Donghyuck, eyes softening just ever so slightly, almost imperceptibly, when he sees Donghyuck awake. Mark tilts his head then, a single eyebrow raising playfully as if to ask, “ _Well? How did I do?_ ”

Donghyuck snorts, and brings a hand up to cover the lower half of his face—futilely trying to hide how his smile stretches even wider, helplessly smitten, before he shakes his head in reply. There’s a second where Mark pouts, the expression so out-of-character from the image of Mark he’d had in his head, before Mark starts to laugh, shoulders shaking silently from behind the soundproof walls.

And before he could help it, Jeno’s words from that one night start to echo quietly in the back of his head.

“ _Though, if you knew who the competition was, you wouldn’t be surprised either._ ”

Oh.

He realizes, right then and there, that Jungwoo was right all along.

Not in this lifetime, indeed.

* * *

The trainee voted _Most Likely to Succeed_ three years in a row, they'd said. A rapper, a dancer, and a leader, all rolled into one package. One of NCT's resident triple threats, loved by almost everyone around him, and someone good enough to make it into SuperM.

Mark Lee, SM’s new age golden boy.

He's _heard_ all about Mark, of course. It's pretty much impossible not to, these days.

Mark's always had quite the reputation to live up to, as revered as he is by his peers, and he wonders how much of it is real, and how much of it is a byproduct of being put on such a high pedestal over the years.

Truth be told, he hasn’t really gotten that many chances to interact with Mark on his own. By the time he’d been brought into NCT and practice had come into full swing, Mark was already too busy promoting with SuperM for them to spend any real time together.

The few times they _have_ managed to be in the same room together though, their interactions have been… kind of awkward, to say the least. Nothing but rushed greetings in the corridors between practice and a handful of stilted conversations—ones that were nothing more than too-polite small talk—before Mark is usually ushered away for something else that demanded his attention.

Needless to say, he doesn't have a lot to go by.

He just hopes he’ll get a chance to find out for himself.

* * *

It’s still a little bit ironic though, and in hindsight, maybe he _should_ have paid a bit more attention to the rumors.

Because if there was anything that has always been a bit of a _known_ thing about Mark Lee, it’s that wherever he goes, it’s pretty much guaranteed that Lee Donghyuck is never too far behind. Like a shadow falling into step, they've always been inseparable—always off in their own little world, regardless of the audience or the constantly flashing lights of the cameras around them.

But it’s odd.

Because from what he’s seen so far, Mark and Donghyuck couldn’t have been more fundamentally _different_ from each other.

From Mark's aversion to most kinds of skinship and Donghyuck's natural propensity for physical affection, to the constant bickering over anything and everything—it's puzzling, he thinks, because either Mark and Donghyuck are fantastic actors, or he's gotten everything completely wrong.

He starts to make it his mission then, to observe them together, curious to see if Mark and Donghyuck behind the scenes could really be anything _more_ than just really close friends.

He watches them from the corner of his eye during practice, takes note of the way they seem to gravitate around each other, the action seemingly unconscious. It's impressive, almost, how they always end up together at the end of the day. Even when they're apart, he sees the way their eyes occasionally look for the other—brief, fleeting glances from the corner of their eyes and furtive smiles exchanged when they think no one’s looking, their heads quickly ducking away before they get caught.

They’re subtle, at least. He’ll give them that.

It makes him wonder how long they’ve been playing this game for, that they’ve gotten so good at hiding it.

* * *

It was one thing to experience Donghyuck from afar, letting him wallow in his unrequited pining in relative peace. It was another thing altogether though, to see him everyday when they’re put together for one of the November units.

90’s Love, they’d called the song. An apt concept, he thinks, albeit the irony isn’t lost on him.

“Donghyuck, if you could just listen for _one_ second—”

They’re a couple of months out from D-day, tensions running high as the exhaustion starts to creep up on _all_ of them. It’s another late night in the practice rooms, and despite the fact that it’s already nearing midnight, they still have a couple hours left on the clock before they can go home.

“Oh, you can get the fuck over yourself, Mark _hyung,_ ” Donghyuck hisses, terrifying in his fury. All eyes are on Mark and Donghyuck—which isn’t necessarily an unusual occurrence in and of itself, but a real fight like this is rare, and it’s the first time, if he recalls correctly, that he’s ever heard Donghyuck use the honorific with Mark. “Talk to me when you get your head out of your ass.”

Donghyuck doesn’t even bother waiting for Mark’s retort before he’s already walking out, slamming the door to the practice room shut behind him with a loud _bang_.

There’s a prolonged beat that passes in stunned silence, everyone’s eyes on Mark’s still figure in the middle of the room as they wait for the other shoe to drop. He can’t see Mark’s expression from where he’s standing, but the tense line of Mark’s shoulders turned towards him as Mark continues to stare at the closed door is telling enough.

Eventually, Mark lets out a slow exhale, one hand reaching up to run frustrated fingers through his already mussed-up hair before falling limply by his side.

Then, a softly whispered, “Shit.”

Jeno’s the first one to move, a concerned frown on his face as he hesitantly reaches out to lay a hand on Mark’s shoulder.

“Mark hyung—”

He’s cut off by a curt shake of the head, Mark’s eyes sliding shut as he jerks his head to the side. Jeno takes a step back, hands coming up placatingly as he retreats to give Mark his space.

A blanket of unease settles around the rest of the room as the seconds continue to tick by, before Ten pointedly clears his throat, clapping once to get everyone’s attention.

“Enough of this then,” Ten says, stern eyes looking over each of them one by one. Mark still hasn’t moved, hands clenched tightly by his sides. “Practice isn’t over yet.”

Ten moves closer to Mark, whispering something into his ear that Sungchan couldn’t hear, before Mark finally tears his gaze away from the door and nods once, mouth twisting into a small frown. He sees Ten’s eyes go over the rest of the team once more, expression contemplative, before finally landing on him.

“Sungchan?” Ten exchanges a brief look with Sicheng, before turning back to him with a wry grin. “Do you mind looking for Donghyuck and telling him to come back? Feel free to tell him that it’s the leader’s orders, if he refuses—”

A hand is quick to clamp down on Ten’s wrist, interrupting him, and Ten’s attention snaps over to Mark, his head bowed low with a troubled look on his face.

“No,” Mark murmurs quietly, although the sound of it nearly echoes around the silent room. “I’ll, um—” His eyes flicker to the door, before he finally looks up, gaze steadily meeting Ten’s own. “I’ll bring him back myself.” At Ten’s surprised expression, Mark wavers for a second, as if remembering who he was talking to. “Oh—uh, sorry, hyung.”

Ten’s brows furrow in concern. “Mark?”

“I just—” Mark cuts himself off, swallowing thickly before shaking his head. “I need to sort this out by myself. Please.”

Ten studies him for a moment before slowly nodding, and Mark’s releases his hold on Ten’s arm.

“You have five minutes,” Ten says, voice low in warning. “And after that, we’re sending someone out to drag both your asses back in here.” At Mark’s relieved expression, Ten sighs, before staring Mark down with an eyebrow raised in judgement. “Seriously, you two. It’s like it hasn’t been—”

“Thanks, hyung,” Mark hurriedly says. “And really, sorry again—”

“Just go, Mark,” Ten snorts, shooing him away with a wave of his hand. “And try not to piss him off even more, yeah?”

Mark pauses, already halfway out the door. He turns back towards them with a small, rueful smile. “No promises.”

The door shuts closed, gentler this time, and Ten turns back to the remaining members with another sigh.

“Alright. You guys know the drill,” he calls out. “Back into formation. From the top!”

* * *

Ten really wasn't kidding when he said five minutes.

After the aforementioned time had passed, and there was still no Mark and Donghyuck in sight, Ten had no qualms sending him out to bring them both back.

 _Youngest's privilege_ , Ten had said. Jeno had only patted him on the back consolingly and said, "Good luck."

It doesn't take him very long to find them, in the end.

He hears Mark before he sees either of them, Mark’s quiet voice carrying around the corner of the silent hallway.

"—know I didn't mean it that way," he hears Mark say, ears straining to pick up on the whispered voices. "Donghyuck—" A split second pause. "Hyuck, _look_ at me."

Sungchan stills at the tone of Mark's voice, at the slightly desperate edge that laces his words, and a sense of deja vu overcomes him when he braces his back against the nearest wall. There's an old stairwell just around the corner, he remembers. Not a lot of foot traffic on this side of the building—a safe choice for anyone that may want to hide from prying eyes.

He waits, breath caught in his chest at the prospect of getting caught listening, but Donghyuck's reply is too muffled for him to hear. He stalls, gnawing at his lip in consideration. He doesn't necessarily want to eavesdrop, especially not for what is clearly an intimate moment.

But still, curiosity wins.

He takes a tentative peek around the corner, lasting no more than just a split second, but enough to see the doors to the stairwell thrown wide open before retreating and straightening where he stands. He counts down the seconds in his head, heartbeat picking up the pace at the prospect of getting caught, before steeling himself with a slow exhale and peeking around the corner once more.

Half-hidden in the dim shadows underneath the stairwell, Mark and Donghyuck appear to be huddled in close—closer than what is probably appropriate for two people who were supposed to be nothing more than coworkers.

"Hyuck." Mark's voice again. He sees the blond strands of Donghyuck's hair shift when Donghyuck just shakes his head, saying nothing in reply.

There's a soft sigh, a little sad and no doubt as tired as they all feel, before he hears Mark try again. " _Baby_. Please?"

He can't really see most of Mark, his body nothing more than a vague silhouette in the dim lighting of the stairwell. It's probably why it’s all the more surprising to see an arm reaching up to wrap around Donghyuck's waist, tightening and rumpling the fabric of Donghyuck's shirt as Donghyuck hesitantly takes a step further into Mark's space.

Mark's other hand comes up as well, cradling the back of Donghyuck's head and gently guiding him into the crook of his neck. There's a moment where Mark does nothing but stroke down the longer strands of Donghyuck's hair, the air surrounding them thick with a kind of tension he can't quite name, but then Mark sighs one more time, head tipping up to press his lips to Donghyuck's temple in apology.

"I'm sorry," Mark murmurs, and Sungchan sees the exact moment Donghyuck decides to give in fully, slumping against Mark's body and tucking his face further into Mark's neck.

He watches them, eyes widening as Donghyuck slowly shakes his head, burying his face further into Mark's shirt and making Mark take a step back at the weight. Donghyuck's arms, which had been hanging limply by his sides up until that point, hastily wrap around Mark's figure to clutch at the back of Mark's shirt.

“I’m—” Donghyuck begins, voice a low, quiet murmur. Sungchan sees Mark nod encouragingly, moving to press another kiss against Donghyuck’s hair. “I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have snapped at you, I was just—”

Donghyuck cut himself off, seemingly at a loss for words and trailing off with a tired shrug.

“Hey, it’s okay, I get it,” he hears Mark say softly, voice lowering to a whisper. “We’re okay.”

A few beats pass without either of them moving, content in their embrace, before slowly but surely, Donghyuck starts to lift his head, angling up as Mark’s hand moves from his hair to cradle the side of his face in a gentle caress. He sees Donghyuck start to lean in and—

Sungchan is quick to look away, eyes unconsciously squeezing shut before he can see anymore, and he retreats once and for all to lean back heavily against the wall.

It just wasn’t right, intruding on their moment any further.

He waits, a few seconds of telling silence passing by with his heart tightening almost painfully in his chest, before he kicks off the wall and makes to leave. He reaches the end of the hallway, steps coming to a deliberating halt, before turning down the hall opposite of the practice rooms.

The long way back, he thinks. It’s the least he could do.

(Although for _who_ exactly it was for, he wasn’t too sure.)

* * *

When he gets back to the practice room—with neither Mark nor Donghyuck in tow—Jeno takes one look at his face before quickly shuffling over to throw a comforting arm around his shoulder. Jeno's eyes are knowing, if not a bit pitying, but Sungchan’s just glad he doesn’t have to say anything for Jeno to get it.

Ten turns towards him when he approaches the rest of their little group, an eyebrow raised in wordless question. Sungchan could only shake his head in response, a small, sad smile on his face as he lifts one shoulder in a half-hearted shrug.

"Sorry, hyung," he says. "I couldn't find them."

* * *

He tries not to make it awkward. Really, he tries his best.

Things don't change much between him and Donghyuck, though that's probably more thanks to the fact that Donghyuck doesn’t seem to suspect a thing. Mark, on the other hand, seems to catch on pretty early. He doesn’t miss the concerned glances Mark throws in his direction whenever he catches the way Sungchan can’t seem to meet Donghyuck’s eyes.

It's futile, trying to avoid either of them. Especially not these days, where it's day in and day out of constant practices, debriefs and even more practices.

Mark isn't the only one to notice his odd behaviour either. Ten's pulled him aside once, to ask if everything was okay. He'd put on his best camera smile and tried to shrug his worries away. Taeyong had done the same, after, and he knows it must've been worse than it looks when someone who wasn't even in their unit had taken notice.

It takes a few days, before Jungwoo decides that enough is enough and barges into his room at some odd hour of the night, only to find him wallowing around in bed in another bout of self-pity.

"This," Jungwoo announces as soon as he closes the door behind him, "is an intervention."

Sungchan looks up from his phone, unable to help the pout that forms on his face. He'd really much rather be left alone, but he knows Jungwoo wouldn't listen.

"What?"

"An intervention," Jungwoo repeats. He watches Jungwoo pull his phone out of his pocket, typing in a quick message and hitting send before turning to him with a raised brow. "Get dressed, we're taking you out."

"What?" he parrots instead. "And who's we?"

"Out," Jungwoo says, stretching out the syllables. "For drinks. You, me, and Jeno. Ten hyung, too, because we need an adult to knock some sense into you." He goes over to Sungchan's bed, tugging at the other's arm to get him to stand up. "You've been moping, and everyone's starting to notice."

It takes Jungwoo more than a little more effort to get Sungchan to stand up—a low whine leaving him as he tries to weigh himself down and become one with the bed—but Jungwoo always had been stronger than he looked.

"Hyung," Sungchan says, though it’s more of a whine than anything else. "I just need some time to get over it, I'll be fine. You don't need to—" he gestures vaguely around Jungwoo's person, "—do all of this. I don't want to make a fuss about it."

"You better appreciate this, kid," Jungwoo continues, unperturbed. "I'm volunteering my precious, _precious_ time to listen to you cry about Donghyuck, of all people." He snorts then, before turning around to rummage around Jungwoo's closet for his coat. "God, I can’t believe I’m subjecting myself to this _again_ —”

“Again?”

“You’re not the first heartbroken sucker I’ve had to give a pep talk to,” Jungwoo quips. “You’d be surprised who else I’ve had to deal with.”

Sungchan raises an eyebrow at that. “Jeno?”

“Among others,” Jungwoo hums noncommitally, a secretive smile playing on his lips. He finds a coat warm enough for the weather and holds it out for Sungchan to begrudgingly take. “Now hurry up, and we’ll meet the others downstairs.”

Jungwoo grins then, and Sungchan resigns himself to a long night.

“First round’s on me.”

* * *

“So,” Ten starts, elbows coming up to rest on the table so he can rest his chin on the palm of his hand. Beside him, Jungwoo waves the waiter over, ordering a couple bottles of soju and a pint of beer for them to share. “Donghyuck, huh?”

Sungchan lets out a weak whine, hiding his face in his hands.

“Do we really have to do this?” he asks, the words muffled into his palms. He peeks a baleful eye out from in between his fingers. “Really, hyung?”

“Better us than anyone else, don’t you think?” Ten grins. “Imagine if you were getting this talk from someone like Taeyong hyung? Or worse—” Ten’s smile turns sharper. “—it could’ve been _Johnny_.”

“Duly noted,” Sungchan mumbles, pouting when Jeno chuckles next to him and pats him on the shoulder consolingly. “But still, it’s embarrassing.”

Their drinks arrive, and Jungwoo is quick to pour them each a shot. “Liquid courage then,” he says, knocking his back before turning to Sungchan and batting his eyelashes playfully. “Now, tell hyungie all about your Donghyuck-related problems.”

“There aren’t—” he sputters, looking down at the full shot glass in front of him. He sighs, before tipping it back, appreciating the warmth burning down his throat. “Really though, there aren’t any problems,” he admits, surprising even himself at the honesty in his voice. “It was just a surprise to see them, is all—”

“Wait, you’ve _seen_ them?” Ten interrupts. “Just so we’re all on the same page, you _do_ know who it is, right?”

Sungchan nods, eyes briefly flickering over to Jeno. “It’s Mark hyung?”

“Is that a question, or an answer?”

“It’s Mark hyung,” he repeats, leaving no room for argument. He turns his gaze down to the empty shot glass in his hands as he traces along the rim with his finger. “I, uh, saw them when you sent me out to go looking for them, actually.”

“So _that’s_ why you’ve been so weird at practice lately,” Ten says. There’s a brief pause, Ten’s head tilting in question. “Do either of them know you know?”

He shakes his head. “I don’t think so,” he answers truthfully. He remembers then, all of the concerned looks thrown his way during practice, whenever he got a little too distracted. “Mark hyung might have an idea though.”

“Mm,” Jeno hums. “Yeah, he probably does.” He moves to fill up all the glasses from the pitcher, passing them around one by one. “He figured me out pretty quickly too, back then. Even asked me if _I_ was okay, if you can believe it,” he continues with a fond smile. “Mark hyung’s a little too nice for his own good, but I think it’s because he _gets_ it too, you know?”

“What do you mean?” Sungchan asks.

“What I mean,” Jeno says, trying to find the right words, “is that Mark hyung’s probably the person who knows what it’s like the most, being in love with Donghyuck.”

Jungwoo snorts. “Everyone’s a little in love with Donghyuck, whether it’s platonically or romantically,” he adds in, matter-of-factly. “But Mark’s one of the few that’s been there since the beginning, hasn’t he? So I’m not too surprised. We all kind of expected it to happen eventually, those two getting together.”

He nods in understanding, because honestly, he can kind of see it. Thinking back to all the signs, he’s surprised he didn’t pick up on it sooner, really.

“That kid,” Ten chimes in, voice softening with a hint of nostalgia, “probably understands you guys more than you think.”

At everyone’s questioning looks, Ten just grins and shakes his head. “But that’s not my story to tell.” He takes a sip of his beer and winks from behind the rim of his glass. “Evil twin secrets and whatnot.”

Jungwoo pouts. “What do you know about Mark that we don’t?”

“That’s between me and God.”

“Ten hyung, aren’t you atheist?”

“Then it’s between me and Mark Lee’s God.”

Sungchan can’t help the incredulous snort of laughter that bubbles out of him at that, badly hidden behind a closed fist as he watches the scene unfold before him. There’s a sudden lull in the conversation, a flush creeping up his neck when he looks up and finds everyone’s attention turned towards him.

Ten’s grin softens to a smile. “There it is.”

Sungchan blinks up at him in confusion. “What?”

“Nothing,” Ten says breezily, with a small shake of his head. “It’s nothing—”

“What he _means_ ,” Jungwoo answers instead, reaching out to pinch at Sungchan’s cheek, “is that you’ve looked so sad these past few days that it’s nice, finally seeing you smile for real again.”

“Oh.” He can feel his cheeks heating up again, ducking his head a little as he says, “Sorry—”

“Nope,” Jungwoo cuts him off. “No apologies from you. We’re not having any of that tonight.”

He snorts at that, but concedes with a small smile and a nod. “Thanks, Jungwoo hyung.”

“You guys should really start a club, you know,” Ten points out with an amused smirk. “You and Jeno. The start of NCT’s very own broken hearts club.”

“See, that probably wouldn’t be a bad idea,” Jungwoo says, an eyebrow raising in interest. The corner of his lips quirk up in a small smirk before taking a swig of his drink. “Limitless members, after all. I’m sure Sungchannie here won’t be the last.”

Jeno lets out another contemplative hum at that, his smile wry as he lifts his glass up to Sungchan for a toast. “Co-founders then?”

Sungchan blinks, a beat passing as he looks around the table. He lets out a soft laugh then, one shoulder lifting in a helpless shrug as he raises his own glass to tap it against Jeno’s with a soft _clink_.

“Co-founders it is.”

* * *

The closer they get to the comeback date, the more antsy he gets.

It can be a bit stifling, living in the dorms with as many people as they do. There's always something going on with someone somewhere—a never-ending bustling of life that he's grateful for on most days, but a nuisance on days where he just wants some time for himself.

He sneaks out sometimes, taking a quick cab ride out to the usual practice rooms and the studios. He definitely isn't the only one that does it either. They all do it occasionally—sometimes in pairs, to work on things together, but most of the time, he sees the members go out on their own.

There's a restlessness to him that lingers on throughout the week, an anxious, excess of energy compounded by all of the stresses that come with an impending debut.

It's close to midnight, the day he decides to go out hunting for an empty practice room—a few days after his little intervention and about a week after he'd caught Mark and Donghyuck together after their fight. Most of the practice rooms in the basement of their building are occupied, even at this late hour, though that isn't all that surprising.

He finds one tucked away in the furthest end of the corridor, the smallest room of the bunch that's usually reserved for soloists. The door is closed, and he can see the lights on from behind the frosted glass paneling on the doorframe, but that isn't what makes him pause.

It's Donghyuck's voice, slightly muffled through the walls but distinctly _him_ nonetheless, singing a song he doesn't recognize.

He raises a hand to knock on the door, but stops half-way, hesitating. He doesn't even remember the last time he'd had a proper conversation with Donghyuck, and while part of him knows _why_ , he can't help but still feel a little guilty for making things awkward.

He dithers by the door for a few more moments, deliberating the pros and cons of actually having to face Donghyuck in person, before letting out a slow exhale and raising his hand to knock once more—

Just in time for the door to be suddenly wrenched open from the other side, Donghyuck's wide eyes blinking up at him in shock.

There's a frozen beat, Sungchan's hand still mid-air, and he takes a second to take in the rest of Donghyuck's slightly disheveled appearance. His cheeks are flushed, though clearly not from exhaustion if his clothes were anything to go by. Donghyuck clearly wasn't dressed for practice, the collar of his button-up askew and rumpled around the edges of the fabric. His bag is haphazardly thrown over one shoulder—he'd clearly just been about to leave, then.

"Sungchan?" Donghyuck breaks the silence first, brows furrowing in confusion.

"Oh, uh," he tears his eyes away and snaps his head back up to meet Donghyuck's eyes. "Hey, hyung."

Behind him, the recording of Donghyuck's voice continues to play from the room's overhead speaker. It wasn't professionally recorded, now that he can hear it more clearly, and it makes him glance past Donghyuck's figure to peek further into the room.

There, seated on the floor with his back against the mirrored wall and his guitar set in his lap, was Mark Lee, flushed in a similar shade of red as Donghyuck with a deer-in-headlights expression plastered all over his face.

His eyes dart back and forth between them, and he can tell that Donghyuck knows he's connecting the dots because Donghyuck lets out a small cough before looking off to the side, the sound of it only serving to add to the already awkward air that's settled around them.

He takes an instinctive step back, hands raised in front of him as he lets out a nervous laugh. "Sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude—"

The tips of Donghyuck's ears start to burn a telling scarlet, and he briefly chances a look back behind him at Mark's still frozen figure inside the practice room.

Mark's head jerks up at whatever expression he sees on Donghyuck's face, hissing out a panicked, "Wait, _Hyuck_ —" that gets ignored when Donghyuck turns back and hikes his bag further up his shoulder with a shit-eating grin.

"Well, I've gotta run," Donghyuck says in a rush, not even bothering to turn back when he says, “I'll see you at home, Mark!” He side-steps past Sungchan's still figure and starts making his way down the hall, but not before tossing a quick, cheeky farewell over his shoulder. "Bye, Channie. Make sure Mark doesn’t stay out too late, okay?"

And then he's left standing there, door to the practice room still ajar, disbelief at what just happened mirrored clear as day on Mark's face. Seconds tick by and the song overheard comes to a stop, Donghyuck’s voice fading away as the loop ends.

Neither of them move for what feels like an eternity passing, before he hears Mark sigh and mumble under his breath.

"I'm gonna kill him."

He takes another step back, ready to bolt just as Donghyuck did, but when Mark looks up, meeting his gaze head-on, he’s greeted with a small, sheepish smile instead.

"Sorry about Donghyuck, really," he says. "You can come in if you want to."

He blinks, because that isn't what he was expecting at all. He does as he's told though, gently closing the door behind him for privacy. "Mark hyung?"

Instead of answering, Mark gets up from where was on the floor, moving over to the stereo console where his phone—signature case and all—was plugged into the AUX cord. The same song that was playing before starts from the top, the soft strumming of the opening guitar playing quietly in the background.

"Is that—” Sungchan asks hesitantly. “That’s Donghyuck hyung’s voice, isn’t it?”

Mark smiles softly down at his phone, nodding. “Yeah, it is.”

He listens to the lyrics as it echoes throughout the room. It's a love song, he realizes. Message ringing loud and clear to anyone that listens to it.

"Is it a cover?" Sungchan asks. "I don't think I've ever heard this song before."

"It's an old one of mine, actually," Mark explains, putting his phone down and making his way back over to where his guitar sits waiting on the floor. "It was something that Donghyuck and I composed together a long time ago. I wrote the lyrics and he sang the demo."

 _Not just a love song then,_ he corrects, taking in the fondness written clearly all over Mark's face. _It’s a confession, too._

"It's really good, hyung," Sungchan admits honestly. "Are you going to release it?"

"Ah, no, no," Mark answers, a little too quickly. He picks up his guitar and starts strumming along to the song. "This one is, uh, just for us. For now, at least." The blush from earlier returns, creeping up Mark's neck in a telling sign. "It's a little too personal, so. Probably for the best, y'know?"

"Of course," Sungchan says. "And sorry, if I wasn't meant to hear it. I didn't mean to barge in here tonight."

"Oh," Mark says, blinking up at him at the apology. "It's fine, there's nothing to apologize for. It's not like we were hiding it or anything." A pause. "Not the song, at least."

The awkward silence from earlier returns then, settling down heavily between them. Sungchan shifts uncomfortably where he stands when Mark doesn't say anything more.

He fidgets from foot to foot, eyes briefly darting towards the door as he takes in a nervous breath.

"Hyung—"

"Sungchan—"

They both stop, a few stunned seconds passing before Mark snorts, dissolving into an awkward sort of laugh as he shakes his head. Something about Mark's hiccuping giggles is infectious though, and he finds himself laughing alongside him as Mark beckons him to sit down on the floor next to him.

"We're terrible at this," Mark starts, before turning to him with an expression that could only be described as _apologetic_. "But I think we're probably due for a talk, aren't we?"

He flushes at that, not really knowing what to say back, so he nods his head wordlessly in reply.

"So," Mark says, hand coming up to rub at the back of his neck, "how long have you known?”

"Honestly?" Sungchan begins. He can feel Mark's curious gaze bore into the side of his face, but he keeps his eyes fixed firmly onto the patterned wood of the practice room's floor. "I've known that Donghyuck hyung was dating someone for a while now." He swallows to clear his throat. "Probably about after a month since practice started with all of us? But I didn't realize it was you until a couple weeks ago."

Mark's eyebrows climb high on his face at the revelation, fingers stilling on the guitar. " _Months_?"

"Yeah," Sungchan answers weakly.

Mark studies him for a moment, and the knowing look in Mark's eyes makes him squirm at the scrutiny.

"You like him," Mark says suddenly, like an echo of Jeno's words all those nights ago. A statement, not a question. "Donghyuck, I mean."

Shame burns low in his chest as he gives a slow nod, unable to meet Mark's eyes. It was one thing to admit it to Donghyuck's friend, but it was another thing altogether to admit to said person's _boyfriend_.

"Yes," he says quietly. And then, when Mark doesn't say anything in the few seconds that pass after the admission, he asks, "Are you... mad, hyung?"

"Well," Mark begins with a soft sigh, fingers drumming hollowly against the body of the guitar. "I can't say that I'm comfortable with it."

The blunt honesty in Mark's voice is enough to make Sungchan look up with a small wince, but he finds none of the judgement he was expecting to see in Mark's eyes.

"But I do get it," Mark continues, expression softening into a mixture of emotions that Sungchan can't quite read—there’s sympathy, of course, but there’s also a hint of something kinder, an almost melancholic sort of understanding. Mark shrugs, and it’s his turn to look away. "So no, I'm not mad at you."

"Hyung?"

"I just—" Mark starts and stops. Another sigh, but this time, it's a little more sheepish. A little more wry. "It's _Donghyuck_ , you know? So yeah, I get it."

The confusion must still show on his face, because Mark lets out a soft laugh. He watches on curiously as Mark starts playing the guitar again, seamlessly picking up where the song continues to play overhead.

"Say, wanna know something?" Mark says suddenly, eyebrows raising almost conspiratorially as he looks up towards him. Sungchan nods slowly, not quite knowing where this was all going but curious nonetheless. Mark strums. "Donghyuck rejected me too, once."

Sungchan freezes. "What?"

"Yep," Mark says with a nod, one corner of his lips quirking up in an odd sort of smile. "Like I said, I kind of know what it's like, being in your shoes. I can't really fault you for falling for him, so no, I'm not mad."

"But—" Sungchan thinks back to all the rumours, to all the conversations he's had with Jeno and the others. "B-but, hyung, it's always been you? It _had_ to be, so—" His brows furrow even more, uncomprehending. "I don't understand?"

"Well, yes," Mark answers calmly. "We'd both known back then, that it was kind of a mutual thing. I'd confessed to him first, actually. Almost three years ago."

"And what? Donghyuck hyung... said no?"

Mark nods, smile turning wistful. "There’s probably only a handful of people that know what actually happened, including you now,” he says. “But yeah, Donghyuck rejected me.”

“But _why_?” Sungchan frowns. All those years of Donghyuck rejecting everyone’s advances, only to reject Mark as well?

Mark leans back against the mirrored wall behind him, head tipping down to focus on the chords.

“It took a while for me to come to terms with it, but I realized that Donghyuck had actually done the right thing,” Mark answers. “Feelings aside, we were both idols that were only a year into our debut. Too many risks, especially with this kind of job, and not enough time for a real relationship."

Sungchan watches as Mark strums, the song coming to an end overhead.

"Neither of us were really ready," Mark finishes, voice quiet. "And it probably wouldn't have worked out if we'd tried to force it, in hindsight."

He thinks back to the last few months since he'd joined NCT, thinks back to the endless hours of work—practice after practice, schedule after schedule, left with barely enough time to breathe on his own. He can only imagine how difficult it must've been, for Mark and Donghyuck both, to have been juggling both their units and whatever it was that _they_ were becoming.

"... And now?” he asks cautiously. “Everything worked out in the end though, didn't it?"

Mark laughs at that.

"Let's just say it took a few months of moping around, both Johnny and Ten hyung putting up with our shit, and then almost a year of us pretending like things were normal before Donghyuck finally caved and just cornered me one day." Mark shakes his head. "We talked. A _lot_. And then talked some more, for good measure, and eventually, we both decided to at least _try_.” He looks up at Sungchan and gives him a small shrug. “And that was enough."

"Wait, hyung, a _year_?" Sungchan can't keep the disbelief out of his voice. "Even after all that time, without any certainty that Donghyuck hyung would've ever changed his mind? You still...?"

Mark's cheeks turn a telling pink, embarrassed affection clear on his face as he nods. "Even after all that time, yeah," he says, voice a little helpless. "I couldn't have helped it, even if I'd tried. Not when it comes to him, I don’t think."

Sungchan thinks back to both Ten and Jungwoo's words from back at the bar—of Mark and his seemingly endless patience—and he can't help the incredulous laugh that bubbles out of his chest as he shakes his head and raises both of his hands out in front of him.

A sign of defeat, he jokingly thinks. Not that it was ever even a competition anyway.

Not when it's never been anything but _their_ story—Mark and Donghyuck, and their being etched in stone since the very beginning.

"Mark hyung," Sungchan grins, feeling a little like there's a weight that's been lifted off his shoulders. "Has anyone ever told you how incredible you are?"

Mark blinks at the sudden compliment. "What?"

"It's nothing, really,” Sungchan shakes his head, grin softening to a smile. “Just thought you should know."

"Uh," Mark ducks his head at the sincerity in Sungchan's voice, lips twitching up into an endearingly shy smile of his own. "Thanks?"

He'd always thought that Mark was lucky, to have been blessed with Donghyuck loving him back. It takes him this moment—of Mark sharing their story to someone he barely knows, just to provide him some comfort after getting his heart broken—to realize that Donghyuck is just as lucky, to have someone like Mark by his side.

"Thank you for telling me though," Sungchan says as he smiles back. "You really didn't have to."

"I was worried about you, you know? We all were," Mark says with another shrug. "Plus, I was meaning to talk to you anyway. I didn't want things to get all weird between any of us, just because Donghyuck and I were together."

“Ah, I’m sorry—”

“No, no,” Mark interrupts. "There's nothing to be sorry for, it isn't your fault for feeling the way you do. If anything, _I'm_ the one who should be sorry—"

"Oh God, hyung, _no_ —"

They both pause, breaking out into another chorus of laughter at the back and forth.

"Truce then?" Mark offers. "We good?"

"More than good," Sungchan agrees. "You really have nothing to worry about though, hyung. I'm uh, slowly but surely getting over him, I think. Jungwoo hyung and the others even threw me an intervention and everything."

Mark raises an eyebrow at that, knowing. "Was Ten hyung there too? Asking too many prying questions?"

The embarrassed flush that creeps up his face is answer enough, and Mark barks out a short laugh. "I can ask them to ease off on the theatrics, if you want?"

He breathes out a sigh of relief before nodding. "Thanks, hyung."

Mark stands up then, setting his guitar aside and holding a hand out for Sungchan to take. He stares at it for a second, before taking it and pulling himself up with Mark's help.

"You were here for a reason though, weren't you?" Mark asks. "Sorry if I distracted you."

"Ah, yeah, I couldn't sleep," he answers sheepishly, initial plans all but forgotten. "There's still some parts of our choreo that I keep getting stuck on, so I figured I'd just practice until I got tired enough."

Mark looks up at the clock above the door, and he follows his gaze to see the time read _12:47_. He watches Mark move back over to the stereo, grabbing his phone and typing out a quick message before grinning up at him.

"I can help you, if you want? I can go over the dance with you for a bit."

Sungchan opens his mouth to protest, not wanting to bother him any further, but Mark's already shaking his head.

"It's no worries, really," Mark grins. "And after everything, it’s the least I could do."

* * *

**sungchannie [1:58 am]**

haechan hyung?

**hyuck hyung [1:59 am]**

yes?

**sungchannie [1:59 am]**

just wanted to say that your secret’s safe with me ^^

and please tell mark hyung

i said thanks again for all the help

* * *

When Mark makes it back to the dorms a little after two in the morning—Sungchan parting ways with him to go back to his own building—he finds Donghyuck waiting for him in the 10th floor’s living room, half-asleep on the couch and buried under one of the throw blankets from Mark’s room.

“Hyuck?” Mark calls out softly, dropping his bag by the foot of the couch and moving to sit beside Donghyuck’s curled up form. “Why’re you still awake? I texted you so you didn’t have to wait up for me.”

Mark brushes his fingers through Donghyuck’s hair, expression softening into something more tender when he sees Donghyuck’s eyelashes flutter sleepily against his cheek. Donghyuck muffles a yawn behind a closed fist before sitting up, blanket falling off his shoulder to pool around his waist as leans against Mark’s side.

“I waited up ‘cause I wanted to sleep in your room,” Donghyuck mumbles, nuzzling into the crook of Mark’s neck as he makes himself comfortable. “Wanted to apologize for ditching you earlier too.”

Mark snorts, leaning back against the cushion and tugging at Donghyuck’s arm to get him to move. Donghyuck goes willingly, throwing a leg over Mark’s hip to straddle his lap instead, and Mark smiles at the content little hum he hears when Donghyuck’s arms wrap around Mark’s middle to trap in him a loose koala hug.

 **“** I still can't believe you did that, you dick," Mark laughs softly, accepting the shameless grin Donghyuck tosses his way when he lifts his head from Mark’s shoulder with a proper kiss. Mark pulls away eventually, huffing as he pulls Donghyuck closer to bury his face into the crook of Donghyuck’s neck. “You’re literally the worst.”

"Mm, poor baby," Donghyuck coos, sounding more awake now. He brings a hand up to run his fingers through Mark's hair, in the way he knows Mark likes whenever he gets a little too stressed. "You're better at explaining these kinds of things than I am, though. You're like, _made_ for damage control."

"You did this last time too," Mark whines, muffled into Donghyuck’s shirt. "Back when the kids found out."

"And you handled that wonderfully," Donghyuck says, purposely patronizing, just because he wouldn't be Mark’s Donghyuck if he wasn't a little bit of a dick.

"The worst," Mark repeats. He looks up then, and pouts. "It didn't make it any less awkward though."

"How _did_ that go, by the way? Sungchan sent me a text earlier so I'm guessing he figured it out?"

"Yeah," Mark sighs. "Apparently, he's known about us for a while? Longer than I was expecting, anyway."

"Than _you_ were expecting?" Donghyuck raises a curious eyebrow at that. "What, like you knew he knew?"

Mark's lips twist into a wry smile. "I had my suspicions, yeah."

"How?"

"Hyuck," Mark says, a little helplessly, a fond sort of exasperation clear in his voice. "You can't seriously tell me that you didn't know that he had a crush on you?"

Donghyuck's reaction is just what he expects—a blank look crossing his face as he processes Mark's words, followed by brows furrowing cutely in confusion. "What?"

"Yup."

"No way? I think I would've noticed it if he did—"

"You're surprisingly oblivious about things like this, did you know that?" Mark laughs in disbelief. "Even if he didn't basically admit it to me tonight, I think everyone but you knew about it."

"But, like, are you _sure_ —"

"Hyuck. Believe me," Mark says, reaching up to flick lightly at Donghyuck's forehead, "when I say that I would know what pining after your dumb ass looks like."

The action earns him a glare from his boyfriend, Donghyuck pinching his side and making him squirm in retaliation.

"So I've been told," Donghyuck says flatly. "Repeatedly." He pouts then, and Mark hates how absolutely weak he is for this boy. "How are you still _on_ that?"

“A year,” Mark teases, the reminder making Donghyuck glare at him with no real heat before he pushes at Mark’s shoulders to make him lean back further against the cushions. “I think I’m allowed to hold a grudge for a little bit longer—”

Donghyuck shuts him up with a kiss, hands sliding from Mark’s shoulders to cup both sides of his face. Mark smiles into the kiss, melting into it and opening up to Donghyuck with a soft sigh. Donghyuck tilts his head as he shifts in his seat on Mark’s lap, nipping playfully at Mark’s bottom lip before deepening the kiss.

“Nice try distracting me, babe,” Mark whispers when he pulls away, but Donghyuck continues on undeterred, instead moving down to trail featherlight kisses down Mark’s jawline. Mark tips his head back when Donghyuck moves further down, soft kisses trailing along the column of his neck, lovingly left on each of Mark’s freckles. “It’s not working though.”

“No?” Donghyuck teasingly whispers against Mark’s skin.

“Nope,” Mark grins, hands coming up to rest on either side of Donghyuck’s hips to stop him in his tracks. “Besides, this isn’t even the first time someone’s crushed on you and you didn’t notice—”

“Lee Minhyung,” Donghyuck gasps as he looks up, though the grin on his face gives him away. “Don’t tell me you were jealous?”

Mark thinks about it for a second, looking up at Donghyuck in front of him, sleep-soft and warm and _his_ , against all the odds.

“Nah,” Mark answers, eyes slipping shut in contentment as he shakes his head. The smile on his face is telling when he teases, “Should I have been though?”

He hears Donghyuck scoff above him, eyes peeking open when he feels both of Donghyuck’s hands come up to frame either side of Mark’s face.

Donghyuck’s eyes are resolute when he meets his gaze, brimming with a warmth reserved for Mark, and _only_ Mark—an expression that hasn’t changed in all the years they’ve known each other.

“Of course not, you idiot,” Donghyuck whispers against his lips when he leans in, voice full of fond affection. “There’s never been anyone but you.”

**Author's Note:**

> [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/dhyuckiees) | [twitter](https://twitter.com/dhyuckIees)
> 
> rip poor sungchan ;; this fic has been a long time in the making, so i hope you liked it ;; as always, kudos and comments are always very much appreciated <3 i'd love to know what you guys thought ^^


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